Written by Jusse C. Loquias
Have you ever felt that feeling of regret? Where you chose the wrong decision and you’re stuck with the wrong people.
I have… I lost my friend a year ago, figuratively and literally…
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A lot of kids these days would always want to be popular, one of the cool kids to avoid the bullies and haters. In doing that they can come out of the shadows, be in the stoplight, stop getting bullied and be the one liked by everyone. What they don’t know that the way to do that there are some sacrifices to make, you may become the bully, yourself, and whether you like it or not you’re trying to be someone that’s not even you or the person who you’re trying to be. It seems like they would do anything to be famous enough and not get anymore hate.
This type of heirchy wasn’t always there it was first made once we got to middle school. Before that it was always the bullies and the nerds. When middle school started there were more classifications and that just made everything worse. Everyone always wanted to be one of the top tier groups, the jocks or athletes, the cheerleaders, or the popular and rich. I was one of those people…
I was just one of the nerds.
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My friends name is Mark. We first met, first day of day care…
I was very shy as that was my first day of school ever and that I didn’t want to talk to anyone, so, I stayed in a chair near a corner just waiting for the ay to end. A kid then sat almost next to me and I thought he wanted to be a friend. “Hi! My name is Ellie. What’s yours?”, I nervously asked as he flinched when I asked him his name.
“I-I’m Mark…”, he’s scared. Did I say something wrong?
“I’m sorry, I thought you came here to talk to me.”, I sighed sadly. “Oh-no… Its fine, I just…. I didn’t think anyone would talk to me.”, he exchanged.
“Oh, I want to talk to you. No one actually wanted to talk to me that’s why I’m in this corner. How about you?”, I tried to strike up a conversation. “I don’t really like it here.”, he said.
“I don’t like it here too, but my mom says that I can learn more in school and I can find new friends in school. My mom also said that I find a friend I can share with them. Do you want some of my food?”, I offered to him the sandwich my mom made.
“You want me to be your friend?”, he asked. “Yeah, why not? Do you not want to be friends?”, I asked.
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And that was the start of our new friendship. We would hang out more after that. Every time after school we would sneak to the back of our school and just eat, talk, play with our toys. There were also days where we would have sleep overs at my place. Our friendship lasted a long time.
I couldn’t really talk about Mark’s situation or go to where he lives. Its just he told me that he lost his parents before he was born, by the time we were in daycare he was living in a foster home with foster parents and he didn’t really want me to go to their house because as he said it wasn’t tidy. But one day, he wasn’t at school the whole day, so I decided to go to their house to check on him. When I got there no one was in the house, but a neighbor of theirs told me that Mark had to go back to the orphanage because his foster parents got reported.
I immediately went to the orphanage to see him…
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“What happened?”, I asked in worry of him hurt. “I’m okay. My foster parents, they got arrested.”, he cried, “I don’t know why but they just got arrested. No one told me why, they just took them.”
“Don’t worry, everything is going to be okay.”, I said in reassurance, “I’m sure they’re fine, we’ll find out more later.”
We got informed that Mark’s foster parents were using him for money. It turns out they didn’t really give him the right amount of food or resources. They were just using him for the money and didn’t really care for him. He didn’t know that because he thought that was how parents treated a child.
I tried thinking of a way to help him and convinced my mom to foster him for awhile, at least until someone adopts him. As my mom become his foster parent, we became closer and become even better friends with each other. But that all changed as we went to middle school.
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During middle school, we were one of the nerds. We stapled ourselves as geeks when it comes to games and our grades aren’t bad. With that, we get constantly bullied by the jocks just to give them our school work or to do their school work for them. It wasn’t really that easy to just tell the authorities on them, because they can just all get away with it.
We really wanted to be one of the popular kids to avoid this kind of treatment. Because, when you’re popular you’re like ‘untouchable’ and no one would want to dare and treat you that way. We did try and changed how we look or how we act. At this point, you could call us desperate, but the bullying only got worse and they just mocked us for trying to be like them.
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All the bullying continued until junior high. That time I finally had the chance to stood up or to blackmail. One of the known bullies had done something that was not tolerated as an athlete and I used that to strike up a deal with them.
I asked them to stop bullying me and Mark and at least put us as a part of their group to avoid other bullies and in exchange for that is, we help them with their class works. They agreed with it, but Mark didn’t.
He thought it was a bad idea and that we should just tell the authorities about it. In that way, they will stop bullying us for good including our friends. But all I thought about was being one of the popular kids. Apparently, I didn’t listen to what he said.
I still agreed to that deal, but I begged them not to do anything to Mark even if he’s not included in the deal. They agreed and everything went as I planned, until…
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Mark told authorities what happened, the people that were involved lost their opportunities to become professional athletes, and they didn’t like what Mark did and they thought they had to punish him. They didn’t tell me anything.
That day started like a normal day except during lunch, I didn’t see most of the ‘nerds’ at their table and the popular kids weren’t complete.
I tried to ask where they are and they all answered me in a sense of worry. Right then and there the rest of the popular kids came into the cafeteria with Mark, bleeding, bruised, and unconscious, holding him by the neck.
“See this?!”, a jock shouted, still holding Mark, “This is what happens when you don’t go our way.”
“You know him, right?”, he asked me with a grin, “You should’ve never left him.”
“What kind of friend are you?!!”, he said as he chuckled and grinned.
Teachers finally stopped that scene and sent Mark to the hospital. I was still in the state of shock seeing my friend beaten up and its all because of me. I find myself in the ambulance with Mark laying there.
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When we got to the hospital, I was asked to stay in the waiting area and a few minutes later my mom arrived and asked me questions, but I didn’t even have the energy to speak.
A few hours later and a doctor approached us and said, “He is now in the ward, you can now visit him. Although, he is in a comma right now, we tried our best. As of now, we are unsure of when he will wake up or if he does wake up, but we will do our best to ensure his wellbeing.”
I didn’t know what to do but just stare blankly at nothing. I thought about how I always wanted to be popular, thinking that being popular would make things better and maybe, just maybe, make him experience something not as violent and hateful for once.
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